Oven-Baked Holidays
As a result of our “broke-as-a-joke” status and our love of cooking, for the past couple years Al & I have decided to do a bake-for-all instead of a buy-for-all. There are many consequences of this decision, some of which are as follows:
- Indoor heating switches from furnace to oven.
- Star quality singing changes genres, from wailing emo to “Simply havin’ a wonderful Christmastime”…yes, it’s played so much that it’s actually considered a genre. Oh, and our duets are good. They’re really good.
- Household scents alternate between heavenly cinnamon swirl bread and “what the hell was on that burner?!?”
- A quick trip to the gym teaches us that we smell much worse than everyone else, like whatever the hell was on that burner…and sweat, of course.
- A four-bedroom house feels so much smaller with two crammed in a one-person kitchen.
- We should have jousted for kitchen time…better yet, we could Wii-box!
- If flour were makeup, I’d totally be into drag…or goth.
- Our favorite holiday treats are even more delicious before they’re baked. Raw eggs – they’re perfectly safe!
- Stomach aches and gritty teeth are all part of the experience, like Audrey being frozen from the waist down in Christmas Vacation.
- Thank god no one else will see our screw-up cookies.
In the end, we feel satisfied knowing that we’ve dedicated an entire weekend to baking for those we love. And if we’re lucky, everyone will still love us after our cat’s fuzz ball toy is recovered…a toy that disappeared in one of our cookie doughs. Just kidding…we think.
